It’s good to have people who cheer us on and speak faith into our lives. A spouse who compliments us, a neighbour with an uplifting word, a friend who is always there to encourage us. However, if nobody is complimenting you, learn to compliment yourself.
If nobody told you that you look good today, why don’t you look in the mirror and say, “Wow, you look good! You are a masterpiece! One of a kind! A prized possession”. The scripture says, “I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.” Psalm 139:14
It’s healthy when you have people that make you feel valued and appreciated. However, it becomes unhealthy if you start depending on them to keep you cheered up. If they don’t compliment you, you don’t feel good about who you are. If they are not there to encourage you, you don’t have the passion. If that coworker doesn’t tell you that you did well on your job, then you are down, thinking you are not doing enough.
Don’t allow your day to go bad because nobody made you feel special; your friend didn’t call, and that neighbour was rude to you… The good news is that you can make yourself feel special, “I am a child of the Most High. I have been handpicked by the Creator of the universe. I have royal blood flowing through my veins”. I am a seed of greatness. I have the DNA of God almighty!
Quit putting how you feel about yourself in someone else’s hands. The scripture says “Build yourself up” (Jude 1:20). Don’t wait for other people to affirm, to approve or to validate you. Approve yourself and learn to compliment yourself. “I’m made in the image of Almighty God. I’m approved, I’m worthy, I’m valuable and I am exceptional.
Every morning before you leave the house, you need to compliment yourself. Don’t go out hoping to get encouraged, hoping someone makes you feel good, “Maybe my friend will cheer me up. Maybe my coworker will compliment me, make me feel valuable”. They don’t control your value, don’t give them that power either. When you compliment yourself, you are not going to be moved by the negative talk, you are not going to be bitter over who didn’t give you a helping hand, and you are not frustrated because people didn’t approve of you. You have already approved yourself.
Nobody said anything good about all your hard work? That’s okay, you already complimented yourself. Nobody clapped for your excellent performers, the ones that should have been so encouraging, and happy for you, they got jealous, they found fault? That’s all right, you already compliment yourself. They didn’t celebrate you, but you celebrated yourself, “Father, thank you for helping me to shine. Thank you for my gifts, my talents, causing me to excel”. You are not dependent on what others do to feel good about who you are.
Nobody should be more for you than you. That’s not being selfish, that’s being responsible with the gift God has given you. Learn to celebrate yourself. You clap for others, when was the last time you clap for yourself? You compliment your friends, when was the last time you complimented yourself? You brag about your excellent coworker, when was the last time you bragged about yourself?
The scripture says, “Out of your heart shall flow rivers of living water” (John 7:38) We are looking to others to keep us filled up, “Keep you encouraged, keep you secure, keep you feeling valuable”. Here is the key: nobody can give you everything you need, nobody can keep you fixed. Your spouse, your friends, your boss, they can’t love you more than anything and be totally for you, but only God can give you what you need. He will use people, but people are limited.
You weren’t created to live relying on someone else, basing your worth on who approves you. Well, Pastor Victor, you wrote a good message today but it’s kind of too complex”. Or “You look all right today but not like you used to look”. Or feeling that you have not measured up, do yourself a favor, and tune out that inner critic. No matter what some people do, there is always a nagging voice, telling them that they should have done better. They live with this inner critic, constantly putting them down, pointing out their faults, magnifying the negative.
You have enough people on the outside trying to push you down, limit your potential, and lessen your value, you don’t need one on the inside. Compliment yourself and turn off that inner critic that is always putting you down. You are supposed to feel good about who you are. I know you have flaws, and areas you need to improve in, so do it. You don’t have to wait until you are perfect to feel worthy and to feel approved.
WE ARE WORK IN PROGRESS!
The truth is that none of us are finished products! We are work in progress. God is still working on us. Even though we have things we need to improve in, you shouldn’t feel unworthy or trying to get people to approve you. God has already approved you, He has already accepted you, why don’t you start believing that you are worthy, that you are valuable? Have you ever compliment yourself? Are you too focused on your weaknesses, how you don’t measure up and you are not as talented as that co-worker?
The enemy would love for you to feel unworthy when in fact you are a masterpiece. The Creator of the universe applauded for you, why are you depending on people to tell you that you are good, you are talented, you are attractive? You are trying to get from them what God has already given you. Why don’t you start appreciating yourself and declaring who God says you are? If you are relying on this from people, it’s going to limit you.
If you are basing your joy, your attitude, and your self-worth on who compliments you, who claps for you and who thinks you are attractive, can I tell you? You don’t need their applause, you can clap for yourself. You don’t need their compliments, you can compliment yourself. Out of your heart shall flow rivers of living water. You are a work in progress. God will complete what He started in you.
For some people, that river has stopped. They have lived their whole life trying to gain their approval, earn their value, and convince people to clap for them. They live frustrated, letting people manipulate them, and down on themselves because they are not getting the applause. Today can be a turning point. Quit looking to people and start looking to God. Nobody is complimenting you, learn to compliment yourself. Nobody is buying you gifts, buy yourself some gifts. Nobody is taking you to dinner, take yourself to dinner.
And yes, there are times you need other people speaking faith into your life, encouraging you, helping you to stay built up, but at some point, God is going to pull them away so you don’t live all your life relying on others to keep you encouraged. You depend on your friends to keep you cheered up, and your family to keep you feeling valuable, that’s a temporary provision.
Like a mother weans a baby off the bottle, God is going to wean you off the external approval, the external applause and the external compliment. You have to learn to get that from the inside. Out of your heart shall flow rivers of living water (The king James version says out of your belly shall flow rivers of living water) It is deep within you, bring it forth. Instead of depending on others, you become self-sufficient. That’s what Paul said in Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” When you go to God, you are not dependent on others.
It’s great when people compliment you but it’s even more powerful when you can compliment yourself. It’s nice when they applaud, approve or validate you. The challenge is that you can’t depend on people. If they are keeping you fixed, that is temporary. God didn’t create you to rely on someone else for your self-worth, your approval or even your encouragement.
My message to you today is to start complimenting yourself. Nobody is clapping for you? Start clapping for yourself! No one is approving you? Approve yourself! You don’t have to go to people to feel special or valued. Go to your Heavenly Father, the God who created you… Allow His word of who you are to sink deeply in you!
If you do this, I decree and declare; that chains of insecurity, low self-esteem, and unworthiness are being broken right now. God is breathing strength, value, freedom, and healing in you. You are rising higher, accomplishing dreams, and reaching new levels of your destiny, in Jesus’ name.
The Lord bless you and keep you; The Lord make His face shine upon you, And be gracious to you; The Lord lift His countenance upon you, And give you peace.”’
